Summer Rain

Summer Rain
I like to photograph nature

Sunday 19 July 2009

Guilt and Guilty Pleasures

Well I am now entering my third week of voluntary unemployment. I seemed to have spent the first two weeks doing laundry, making a half hearted attempt at cleaning out the kitchen cupboards and preparing for interviews. I have come to the decision that I will not be applying for any more jobs for a little while to give me time to sort myself out and really think about what I want to do next. Trouble is I am constantly feeling guilty! I feel guilty because I am not working, unemployment is something I haven't experienced before, I have worked ever since I left school. Also, because I have always worked long hours and often had to travel away from home a lot, we employ a small amount of help. I have a lovely lady who comes in one day a week to clean, another pair of lovely ladies who come in once a week to tidy the garden (leaving me free to just to the interesting gardening at the weekend) and finally a great dog walker who comes in every afternoon to feed and walk our dogs to ensure they are not left alone for too long.

When we made the decision for me to give up my job, we also decided to keep everybody on, as if I go back to full time employment, it would be impossible to find such good helpers again. Trouble is, it is one thing coming home and finding the house has been vacuumed, or the garden swept, quite another thing actually being there while someone is doing your work for you! I have started hiding up in the office, or going out shopping to avoid having to feel so guilty.

On the other hand, not working definitely has its benefits. I have been able to do my piano practice regularly, I have got my guitar out and started hardening off my fingers again, started sorting out my paper crafting stuff and found my crochet hooks. I treated myself to two new crochet books and some lovely new yarn that I can't wait to get started on. I have time to blog. Have lunch with a friend on a weekday. See what my garden looks like in daylight. Guilty pleasures indeed, but I shall make the most of them while I can.

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