Monday Musings

Monday morning and I am feeling a bit out of sorts.  Too much red wine and good food last night methinks.  So I enter my fourth week of voluntary unemployment.   One third of the kitchen cupboards have been sorted out.  The bureau in the dining room is sorted out.  The Wii is out of its box, but doesn't work...  Aaaaarrggghh.   Most of the contents of the study are on the floor.  The washing is up to date, but the ironing isn't.   I haven't started my keep fit regime yet.  I have accumulated yarn, material, patterns for at least 4 projects I plan to start.   I have not yet done my music theory homework.  I have however, spent an inordinate amount of time on line, twittering, blogging, general surfing.

This is all telling me that I need to get me a routine!  I am used to spending a great deal of time in front of a PC at work, so I have fallen into the habit of opening up the macbook with my morning coffee and before I know it I have lost a couple of hours!

This all has to stop.  Today I will work out a routine to make best use of my days.

But first I must talk to Amazon about my Wii.   Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrgggghhhh!!!

Guilt and Guilty Pleasures

Well I am now entering my third week of voluntary unemployment. I seemed to have spent the first two weeks doing laundry, making a half hearted attempt at cleaning out the kitchen cupboards and preparing for interviews. I have come to the decision that I will not be applying for any more jobs for a little while to give me time to sort myself out and really think about what I want to do next. Trouble is I am constantly feeling guilty! I feel guilty because I am not working, unemployment is something I haven't experienced before, I have worked ever since I left school. Also, because I have always worked long hours and often had to travel away from home a lot, we employ a small amount of help. I have a lovely lady who comes in one day a week to clean, another pair of lovely ladies who come in once a week to tidy the garden (leaving me free to just to the interesting gardening at the weekend) and finally a great dog walker who comes in every afternoon to feed and walk our dogs to ensure they are not left alone for too long.

When we made the decision for me to give up my job, we also decided to keep everybody on, as if I go back to full time employment, it would be impossible to find such good helpers again. Trouble is, it is one thing coming home and finding the house has been vacuumed, or the garden swept, quite another thing actually being there while someone is doing your work for you! I have started hiding up in the office, or going out shopping to avoid having to feel so guilty.

On the other hand, not working definitely has its benefits. I have been able to do my piano practice regularly, I have got my guitar out and started hardening off my fingers again, started sorting out my paper crafting stuff and found my crochet hooks. I treated myself to two new crochet books and some lovely new yarn that I can't wait to get started on. I have time to blog. Have lunch with a friend on a weekday. See what my garden looks like in daylight. Guilty pleasures indeed, but I shall make the most of them while I can.

A day at home - So why am I stressed?

I have the day off today, mainly because I am supposed to be preparing for my piano exam, but so far I have read the papers, logged in on my work laptop and done a few things I didn't get done last night. Had a chat with Marion who comes every wednesday and keeps the level of mess in the house to a minimum, checked my emails, Twittered a bit, eaten a bowl of Cheerios and drunk too much coffee (Decaf for the rest of the day).

Why am I avoiding starting my preparations, why haven't I revised my scales, or even stayed in the same room as the piano for more than a minute all morning? Because I don't really want to do the exam, that's why. I am learning piano for my own pleasure and and it is a divine pleasure I love every minute of my lessons and my practice sessions, but I hate the performance exams. I even enjoy doing the theory exams and next week I will be taking my Grade 4 music theory and am quite looking forward to it. The problem is, I have got myself into the position of not wanting to let my music teacher down instead of doing it for myself. I am going to have to tell her.

I have lots of things rattling around in my head today that are diverting my attention and writing them down may help me get them into some order. So I will post again in a bit and chew over something else to help sort my thoughts out. In a the meantime, I think a quick look at today's OMW and then raid the fridge for lunch.

TTFN
(Ta Ta for Now)

Friday Night Musings

So it's Friday night.  The working week is over and the weekend sprawls before me full of opportunities and chores.   I am in the sitting room on the sofa, feet up in front of a roaring fire.  I have a glass of chilled fino sherry on the side table and I can hear my husband pottering in the kitchen preparing dinner (did I mention before about being spoilt?).   Friday night is couch potato night, always a treat after a busy week.   But what of tomorrow.   As usual, I have a list of things I mean to do this weekend that, if I actually attempted them all would take at least a month to actually achieve.

This is my major fault, I over-commit.   There are so many things I want to do and then there are all the things I have to do.   But this weekend will be different I tell myself.   I will set realistic goals, I will prioritise must do over want to do.   I will not convince myself it is possible to learn Italian in a weekend whilst carrying out a new keep fit/lose weight program and at the same time tidy the garden, do the washing/ironing, hang the new photographs, make some cards, sort and scan all my old photographs, figure out how to put a play list on my blog, do my piano practice and write the lyrics for the band's new song that I have been struggling with for three weeks.  (More about the band another day).

This weekend I will ....  not make a list of things I will do this weekend.